Remember, this is the best time of the year on the Exchanges as the Squares relax and even give the Wives a go. Bleed the Sheep and have a Happy Xmas.
12-11-2006, 08:38 AM
"Bed Bug Thread
There seems to be enough People interested in the Topic so I hope I dont get hoisted on My own Petard for posting it.
Bed Bugs are probably the One single reason that My ability to win Money from Gambling is deteriorating, its because so much of My time is now used up thinking about their annoyance. My post in another Thread asking what they do when you fart full on to them merely states My original question some Years ago. Since then with the help of My Microyoubebiologuidist Daughter, I have become somewhat an Expert on their existance.
Firstly it has to be addressed that the recommended Hoovering your Mattress is asking for trouble, you see your hoover is full of Dust Mites and are BBs favourite meal outside Semen and Turd clinkers, Bed Bugs overdose on the extra Feast and multiply their Number quicker than an RX Tout. Whats the problem I hear you say? Well, too many Bed Bugs in a confined space like any Species means migration.
Getting back to the Farting situation for a minute, BBs are not mugs, they soon realise that although being down that end of the Bed has its bounty of semen/clinker, times can be hard, overcrowding, in-house fighting, high mortality rate, not to mention the smell, just like our Cities. So sooner or later they migrate up to the top of the Bed, that itch in your Ear at Night is probably a sign of Migration. However, some of these bastards are lazy and instead of going up the top of the Bed, go straight up your Jax. The itching around your Ballbag and Asshole at Night is without doubt caused by migrating BBs and once housed, are a pain to get rid of.
How does this affect my Betting I hear you say, well if your using any systems like "The Itchy Ball " or " Hemorrhoid Status" Theories then you will be getting the wrong signals and of course for normal Punters the incessent itching can play havoc with selections. So how do you eleviate or control the situation?
These steps may sound radical but you must remember your Bankroll is at stake. Any symptoms must be met immediately with you eating Garlicky Food and Eight Pints of Beer a Night. You make sure you give the Wife enough Drink to knock Her out and at Bedtime wedge a Bogroll Centre between the cheeks of her Arse, thereby giving easier access to the migrating BBs. Hopefully your successful Gambling goes on unhindered while telling the Wife that your sure Her itch will go in time.
